Two and a Half Men — S11E01 — Nangnangnangnang

00:00:04 Tell me, Henry,

00:00:49 Every time he opens his mouth,

00:01:40 Oh, no, no, he's interviewing to be my assistant.

00:02:23 People in rent disputes don't fake their own death.

00:03:23 You got any aspirin, ibuprofen, rum, Scotch, tequila, vodka?

00:04:20 I mean, this could be some kind of scam.

00:05:05 - Yeah, got one every month. - Bastard.

00:06:05 I was born in New York, got kicked out of a few private schools,

00:06:58 He asks, knowing full well she's a Harper.

00:07:45 I always tried to imagine what my dad's life was like.

00:08:42 and pretty much anything that could absorb fluid.

00:09:31 and then I wind up back in this room,

00:10:31 Wow, insta-family.

00:11:19 Almost as weird as when we take him to the movies.

00:12:34 I'm sure you have a story about Charlie

00:13:34 Oh, my God. Look at you.

00:14:31 If she's staying anywhere, she's gonna stay at my place.

00:15:14 You know, in fact, there is no Jake's room

00:16:12 Nang, nang, nang, nang, nang...

00:16:59 I mean, the truth is, my mother is an amazing woman.

00:18:01 To Charlie.

00:18:51 There's a little something for you in my will.

00:19:46 Well, it's... Yeah.

00:20:51 - You were saying? - Shut up.