Two and a Half Men — S09E16 — Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

00:00:03 LYNDSEY: Oh, God.

00:00:39 A guy in a leotard and a skirt...

00:01:17 - Uh, pejorative is having a derogatory... - I know what the word means.

00:02:06 Wow. Heh-heh-heh.

00:03:20 It's a shame, really. So much I could teach the poor girl.

00:04:11 Maybe it's her nooks and crannies.

00:04:53 No. I took you to the opera so you would have sex with me.

00:05:37 - Two can play at that game. ZOEY: Oh. Oh!

00:06:35 Oh, yeah.

00:07:29 So all that noise was, uh...?

00:08:18 That's the bad laugh.

00:09:06 As a matter of fact, we're gonna spend the night at a little bed-and-breakfast...

00:10:06 Probably inside that giant sinkhole.

00:10:54 I'm just saying I never lie to my daughter.

00:11:37 - Yeah, some of us older than others. - Oh!

00:12:33 Two women who shouldn't be anywhere near each other trapped in a house...

00:13:17 Why don't I take that light off and give you a colonoscopy?

00:14:17 And we certainly need the water.

00:15:17 Mind if I share your wine?

00:16:11 ZOEY: Mm.

00:16:59 I'm on the pill.

00:17:47 Put a crimp in the reception.

00:18:29 It is, isn't it?

00:19:23 Seriously, let me go.