Two and a Half Men — S07E17 — I Found Your Moustache

00:00:04 - I'm gonna hate this movie. - How can you be so sure?

00:00:53 Damn. I don't believe it.

00:01:25 NPR called it "an enchanting journey of self-discovery."

00:02:10 What?

00:03:38 Okay, punish yourself.

00:04:22 How's it gonna look if I get a DUI on the way to spy on my ex-girlfriend?

00:05:10 - What are you doing with a mustache? - Don't worry, it's fake.

00:06:04 Good thing he doesn't know where her mouth has been.

00:07:01 Oh, looks like she's heading for Malibu.

00:07:39 I have Mercedes Gold Platinum Valet something or other.

00:08:38 Hey, Uncle Charlie, you look like a '70s porn star.

00:09:34 Well, just that you're gone.

00:10:35 You're gonna have to do better than that.

00:11:38 Good morning, all.

00:12:23 Oh, that's never good.

00:13:19 Feel like talking?

00:14:34 You just cannot predict it.

00:15:29 Bum, buh, duh, duh

00:16:20 No, but you can dummy up. I mean, look at the poor bastard.

00:17:20 What did I do wrong? What could I have done differently?

00:18:07 She's not gonna miss you if you're squatting in her living room...

00:19:00 Well, what do you think?

00:20:03 What I'm saying is that I know you were trying to cheer me up...

00:21:08 Don't worry, I'll wait for you on the other side.