Two and a Half Men — S06E13 — I Think You Offended Don

00:00:02 Let's see. Sperm meets egg here.

00:00:58 No tip?

00:02:03 This is when Judith and Herb broke up.

00:02:58 I don't expect you to understand.

00:04:07 - Yes, we did. - Read my lips. We did not have sex.

00:04:48 Really? I didn't notice that on the stencils.

00:05:39 Oh, man. Can you imagine him as a chick?

00:06:28 Oh, dear God, Charlie. What have you done?

00:07:23 My son is not a monkey.

00:08:26 - Two. - I'm only leaving because I'm bored.

00:09:25 Just call me Vincent van Gogh-ing to help you.

00:10:16 You couldn't really do that.

00:11:11 The down side is they're so damaged...

00:12:01 - Mildred Melnick? - Yeah. We could call her Mil or Millie.

00:12:47 Oh, yum. Thank you.

00:13:43 What's the deal with this party I'm supposedly not letting you go to...

00:14:33 Anyway, I was in this bar and I met this beautiful woman...

00:15:34 Okay, I get it.

00:16:28 Here, I'll show you.

00:17:25 Ooh.

00:18:22 Um, we heard some shrieking and, uh, found baby Jake...

00:19:19 How do I look?

00:20:12 Don't worry. You can't ruin this shirt.

00:21:31 Woof.