Two and a Half Men — S04E05 — A Live Woman of Proven Fertility

00:00:01 After the kid goes back to his mother's, you wanna go out and grab some dinner?

00:00:46 Which is actually getting easier now that I'm wasting away.

00:01:42 You know what? Okay, I'll just stay here and have a Popsicle.

00:02:44 I just, uh... I wanted to let you know that, uh...

00:03:30 Still, I wish you the best, though.

00:04:48 Because with Judith getting married again...

00:05:21 I'd be gone by now and you'd never know I was here.

00:06:08 How do you keep getting in? I've changed the locks three times.

00:06:57 What's your plan? Where are you headed?

00:07:40 - Don't be mean to your mother. - You're mean to your mom.

00:08:30 But I think it's something that you're old enough to understand.

00:09:17 May I suggest you try a more, shall we say, practical approach?

00:10:27 putting Jake on any sort of medication?

00:11:20 - No... - I know what you're thinking.

00:12:13 Oh, sure you are. You'll be terrific, right?

00:13:01 Hey, listen, why don't we go out and talk about this over a couple of beers?

00:13:57 - That would be a blessing from heaven. - Oh, I don't know if I want more kids.

00:14:54 - And to Judith. - Absolutely. Judith's great too.

00:15:39 if this is a bachelor party...

00:16:52 Uh-oh. It's Judith.

00:17:53 she's stupider than you.

00:18:42 I'm thinking, maybe I'll go around the world.

00:19:51 Well, that was close.

00:20:42 and one orange soda.