Two and a Half Men — S03E20 — Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro

00:00:05 Hey, what are you doing home in the middle of the afternoon?

00:00:57 for sex.

00:01:42 I'm not going back to Tijuana for another X-rated performance...

00:02:31 Anyway, it would seem to me the simple solution is to find someone...

00:03:52 CHARLIE: Hang on.

00:04:36 Okay.

00:05:20 The first time I had sex with your daughter, I barely got my pants off.

00:06:10 I didn't say now.

00:07:10 - I don't think that's a good idea. - Why?

00:07:58 I know I can be a bit of a control freak and...

00:09:03 KANDI: I know you two are gonna love each other.

00:10:01 I'm completely naked.

00:10:55 - Go ahead, Alan. - Thank you.

00:11:35 Speaking of which, did you ever see The Bride and the Burro in Tijuana?

00:12:35 Yep, if I married Kandi, she would be your stepmother.

00:13:29 - I want you to meet Mandi. Mandi, Berta. - Hi.

00:14:13 I'm just wondering when some of that gravy's gonna spill over on my taters.

00:15:10 Where's Kandi?

00:15:58 - I am so sorry. - No, I'm sorry.

00:16:54 ANDY: Well, thank you, Judith. I had a wonderful evening.

00:18:05 Couldn't find him.

00:19:08 - Anybody? - Over here.

00:20:15 I'll give you a call, Judith. Maybe we'll hit some garage sales.

00:21:09 - How's the head? - Let's find out.