Two and a Half Men — S03E11 — Santa's Village of the Damned

00:00:07 Uh-oh.

00:00:58 So, Sandy...

00:01:50 - But she sure can cook. - Well, guess how we met.

00:02:37 - Can I have some more bacon? - Oh, in a jiff.

00:03:29 Yeah, going to our mother's would cut into that.

00:04:18 She throws you some tail, a couple of pieces of bacon...

00:05:22 Oh, wait, it's possible that you remember me as Dr. Philip Gonzalez.

00:06:21 Probably because you didn't have the proper tool.

00:07:15 Ooh.

00:08:05 We're having rack of lamb.

00:09:08 I am cutting down on carbs.

00:10:04 Don't play with me, Alan.

00:10:51 - I could eat. - Well, you're gonna.

00:11:38 and you're probably gonna be seeing her a lot.

00:12:28 Remember what I told you about nesters?

00:13:33 Will you look at that? They're bonding already.

00:14:20 - Whose home is it, Alan? - Okay, fine, I will have a talk with her.

00:15:26 Who moved the reindeer?

00:16:08 Donner, Blitzen, Donner, Blitzen, Donner, Blitzen.

00:17:33 - Oh. - You're kidding, right?

00:18:32 Okay, I'm ready for more pie.

00:19:36 Who's not coming?

00:20:23 No. No, that would be taking advantage...

00:21:30 Dear God, look at the size of your ass.