Two and a Half Men — S03E09 — Madame and Her Special Friend

00:00:05 - Jake? - Yeah?

00:00:52 He said you should pray to strike down your teacher?

00:01:31 Hey, hey, let me tell you about your Uncle Charlie.

00:03:18 My mother says I am, but frankly, I have my doubts I'm related to her.

00:04:20 Charlie, we have a situation.

00:05:11 CHARLIE: Uh-oh. Look what's dirty again.

00:06:03 You would have made a good one.

00:07:05 Eat any little kids lately?

00:07:49 I'm looking forward to next Saturday.

00:08:38 - to the birth of agriculture. - Stop it.

00:09:31 I so loathe going to these things by myself.

00:10:40 I'll give you a hint.

00:11:57 And finally, the big bang...

00:12:38 You don't have to bite my head off.

00:13:28 Well, the building would be in Beverly Hills...

00:14:18 Alan, did you really think I would?

00:15:06 I got health insurance for my family instead.

00:15:52 To us as... As business partners and friends, right?

00:17:10 - What? - I gave in.

00:17:59 You're kidding.

00:18:47 Well, I'm not sure, but I think she said:

00:19:44 So... So if you slept with Norma, why did she hate you so much?

00:20:39 Then you leave me no choice.

00:21:24 Don't blame me. You're a sinner.