Two and a Half Men — S03E02 — Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover

00:00:02 Doc, how many more adjustments do you think I'm gonna need?

00:00:51 Well, let's see.

00:01:54 Well, what about Jake?

00:02:55 - Hi. - How come you're not in school?

00:03:33 And that country you're thinking of is this one, genius.

00:04:35 - Jake could get expelled. - For a silly drawing?

00:05:23 You know what, maybe I should talk to him.

00:06:05 Okay, you're right. I'm sorry, I should have picked up the phone.

00:06:54 - In your office? - Yes.

00:07:38 Never even came home.

00:08:29 You gotta wonder how long he'd keep burning that penis at both ends.

00:09:15 Yeah, I hate it when that happens.

00:10:37 - Oh, click. - What?

00:11:17 I got it. Trunkin' Donuts.

00:12:21 Charlie, listen to me very carefully.

00:13:51 I said, "Dr. Harper's office."

00:15:23 I'm here for the masseuse position.

00:16:18 So now my breasts are a load?

00:17:14 I'm sorry, Dr. Harper's not in this morning.

00:18:06 Another coinage of mine.

00:18:59 Oh, God, my boy's gonna get the chair.

00:20:08 and you turned my business into a brothel.

00:20:50 on the grounds of Woodward Avenue Elementary School.

00:21:31 Oh, wait, somebody already has that.