Two and a Half Men — S01E11 — Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

00:00:05 Okay, after I get the tickets, you line up for the popcorn,

00:00:48 Now for her, I'd stand in line for a butter squirt.

00:01:37 Hi, nice to meet you. I'm the ex.

00:02:17 Phil, we'd better go.

00:03:03 Place your bets. Where she lands, nobody knows.

00:03:38 I don't know, by saying things like, "Sure you can. I'll help you."

00:04:12 This could be the beginning of the rest of my life.

00:05:35 - Pretty much everything. - Everything?

00:06:23 Hey, guess what?

00:07:10 - Why should I change? - So you'd look cool like Mom.

00:07:53 - Get your jacket. - Fine.

00:08:39 Go ahead, check it out.

00:09:15 - What? - What?

00:10:09 - I thought you were gonna help me? - Pick something.

00:11:39 - Ten. - Seven.

00:12:27 Now, let's see.

00:14:11 he's a sponge?

00:14:54 No, Charlie, I'm done. I can't do this anymore.

00:15:31 I'm not even gonna dignify that with a response.

00:16:15 - Where's my mother? - She left.

00:17:14 - Mind if I join you? - Might as well.

00:17:49 It's who I was, it was my identity,

00:18:37 - Charlie, what are you having? - Tequila shooters with a beer back.

00:20:22 English -SDH