The Invention of Lying

00:00:48 Testing. Testing.

00:04:28 Yeah.

00:07:15 No, not very attractive. No, doesn't make much money.

00:11:25 entertaining and even hilarious moments from world history

00:15:16 -You're fired. -I am fired, yeah? 'Cause I sort of...

00:18:22 You should say your final goodbyes today.

00:21:44 but you said you wanted to withdraw 800?

00:25:20 And maybe have sex with them, too.

00:28:44 That's too much, I think. Why so high?

00:31:50 I just won the major jackpot on that machine, but no money came out.

00:36:50 I think you'll hardly recognise me.

00:40:37 "crashed down from the skies and landed in the heart of Babylon."

00:44:08 But I've been blessed with some luck as well in my life.

00:47:57 It's not an eternity of nothingness.

00:53:48 -Yes. -And how did that make you feel?

00:58:04 Sorry, people. I've got a lot to get through here. Can we just...

01:01:05 Taking their stuff, doing things to people they don't want done

01:06:33 The burning building, baby, bear, factory, jam incident?

01:10:24 He’s fat, he’s stupid-looking. What else do you need to know?

01:13:17 That's what I said. But hold on, though. What about the coupon?

01:16:12 -Yes, your daughter looks beautiful. -Ah!

01:19:44 Oh, wait, Mom, don't change it. That's my very good friend.

01:25:24 What's your name?

01:30:52 Well, now, it's not up to us to decide what we get in life.