The Bad Mother's Handbook

00:00:02 What would I like? Luxury holiday abroad.

00:02:07 Vital.

00:04:16 Only, I want a word with you.

00:06:44 - For God's sake. - Er, you stay where you are.

00:08:59 and two healthy children - suggested names Annabel and Max.

00:11:24 - Are you not my mother? - And he conked out.

00:14:28 It was to Paris.

00:17:01 lllegitimate and with a mystery granny, it's pretty cool.

00:20:03 Well, it's hard to generalise, really.

00:23:06 It was Surrey, Nan. You told me that.

00:26:05 There's only one way to find out.

00:29:39 One per cent... at most.

00:32:22 if you ever thought about anyone but yourself.

00:34:46 I don't want fuck all to do with it.

00:37:25 Do your family know you're here?

00:40:13 Well, that is the pot calling the bloody kettle, isn't it?

00:43:25 - Thanks. I don't know what... - It's only from the catalogue.

00:46:08 Common pregnant slapper gets claws into genius son.

00:49:18 D... E... D. Dead.

00:54:05 I had a sister. Claire.

00:56:50 Charlotte, I need to speak to you.

01:01:08 He's gonna be called Will.

01:03:49 ~ I'm as rich as a millionaire ~

01:07:04 How am I supposed to look after him if I don't wake up when he's screaming?