Saturday Night Live — S05E15 — Richard Benjamin, Paula Prentiss/The Grateful Dead

00:00:01 Announcer: POLICE BOAT WILL BE SEEN HALF AN HOUR LATER THAN USUAL TONIGHT SO THAT WE COULD

00:01:59 AND HE ASKED ME IF I THOUGHT PITTSBURGH COULD USE A NEW DAM OR A POST OFFICE AND I SAID

00:03:52 NOT REALLY, ALTHOUGH HE SEEMED TO BE REAL SUBDUED. AND AFTER HE STOPPED CRYING,

00:07:10 I, UH, I WAS CUT FROM THE OPENING. I WAS SUPPOSED TO PLAY

00:08:53 I'M GONNA GO GET INTO MY BARRY MANILOW COSTUME NOW.

00:11:40 I HAVE EVER SEEN!" AND HE WILL LOVE ME SO MUCH HE WILL TAKE ME AWAY TO HIS DUDE

00:14:15 LEIF, AND THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND, AND KISS AND THE WALTONS AND CHARLIE'S ANGELS AND MORK AND

00:20:07 MY WIFE HAS AN INCREDIBLE SENSE OF SMELL. YOU'RE CRAZY.

00:22:31 WELL... RON... HOW WAS I?

00:26:02 I'M PROBABLY NOT HAVING A STROKE. I THINK I JUST DON'T FEEL GOOD.

00:28:52 DO YOU HAVE A TOILET IN YOUR KITCHEN, BILL? NO, I USE THE CUISINART.

00:30:53 FOR THE LAST WEEK OF SPRING TRAINING, THEY'RE GONNA GO BACK TO WORK FOR OPENING

00:32:57 AS A MAJOR WRITER / PERSONALITY FOR A MAJOR T.V. SHOW, I DID... PRETTY WELL.

00:35:15 NOW, OBVIOUSLY, I COULDN'T HAVE TAKEN THIS PICTURE UNLESS I'D ACTUALLY GONE TO HAWAII,

00:37:36 JAN AND JOE ROMAN OF WILSKBURY SENT US THIS NUCLEAR MELTDOWN BIRTHDAY CANDLE TO MARK THE

00:40:22 WELL, I'M GLAD YOU FEEL YOU'RE MAKING PROGRESS BUT I THINK YOU'RE CONFUSING

00:42:47 WELL, I STOOD IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR AND I SAID, "WHAT A FOX!"

00:45:19 I HAVE NO MONEY, IT'S DARK OUT. BUT PEOPLE ARE SO FRIENDLY IN NEW YORK.

00:48:56 REMEMBER, KHOMEINI DOES NOT ASK QUESTIONS, HE ONLY DIVINES

00:53:11 GIN OR CANASTA? EH, WE REALLY AREN'T CARD PLAYERS.

00:56:08 OF 'EM ALL... All: THE JOEY BISHOP SHOW! STARRING!

00:58:33 NO, BUT I DON'T WANNA TAKE ANY CHANCES. YOU KNOW, JOEY HAD

01:04:53 Sgt.: NOW, WHO'D WANT TO HARM A FRIENDLY LITTLE FELLOW LIKE YOURSELF?

01:06:40 WE HOPE YOU DID TOO! THANK YOU!