Saturday Night Live — S02E08 — Paul Simon/Paul Simon, George Harrison

00:00:00 Announcer: PORTIONS OF THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM HAVE BEEN PRE-RECORDED.

00:01:17 AGAIN. OKAY. BEAUTIFUL.

00:02:45 IF YOU DON'T GO ON TONIGHT, IT'LL BREAK HIS HEART. I MEAN, IT MUST BE...

00:06:20 YOU WANT TO BE MR. ALIENATION? YOU CAN BE MR. ALIENATION." WELL, I DIDN'T WANT TO BE

00:08:12 THAT'S WHY WE START EACH DAY THE NATURAL WAY... WITH A BIG BRIMMING BOWL OF

00:11:49 ♪ AND I BELIEVE IN THE MORNING YOU'LL BEGIN TO SEE THE LIGHT" ♪ ♪ AND THEN SHE KISSED ME AND I

00:14:59 VIETNAM WAR ENDED. DR. KISSINGER, IN CONCWUSION, THERE IS ONE THING THAT WEAWY,

00:17:24 MY GOODNESS. YOU FRIGHTENED ME. WELL, I'M SUPPOSED TO MEET

00:19:31 ROOM SERVICE. WAIT! THERE'S MORE. "COMPLIMENTS OF... THE

00:21:59 THE BAIL WAS $1.5 MILLION IN CASH AND BONDS, AND ALTHOUGH OFFICIALS DENY THAT THE HEARST

00:23:46 AREA ARE WEARING KNEE SOCKS. THIS STORY FROM BELGRADE, YUGOSLAVIA.

00:25:38 WHICH IS $50,000 A YEAR FOR LIFE. UTAH LOTTERY OFFICIALS SAY THEY

00:27:33 GENERALISSIMO FRANCISCO FRANCO. HE, TOO, HAS BEEN RECEIVING GIFTS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD,

00:29:18 I'M CURIOUS. JUST WHERE DID YOU GET THIS PARTICULAR SAMPLE FROM?

00:35:04 TO ME ♪ ♪ THE MOVIES AND THE FACTORIES ♪ ♪ AND EVERY STRANGER'S FACE I

00:40:24 ♪ KNOW THAT THE LORD IS WELL AND INSIDE OF YOU" ♪ ♪ "AND WE WELCOME YOU TO

00:43:14 NOT THE BILLY PAUL THAT RECORDED "ME AND MRS. JONES." A LOT OF PEOPLE GET THEM

00:45:23 THAT'S REALLY BEAUTIFUL, HONEY. THAT'S REALLY BEAUTIFUL.

00:47:21 MAN, BILLY PAUL! OH, MY GOD, BERNARD. LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE.

00:53:06 TO BE SO BOLD ♪ ♪ SOME PEOPLE NEVER SAY THOSE WORDS "I LOVE YOU" ♪

00:55:23 DO YOU DO IT, SIR? LET ME JUST START OFF BY SAYING THAT I AM NOT AN

00:56:50 WELL, SIR, THEN, AT THIS POINT, LET ME ASK YOU, WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU DO?

00:58:16 COMMERCIAL WITH AN 85-YEAR-OLD INTERIOR DECORATOR WHO CLAIMS SHE WAS ABDUCTED BY 9-FOOT-TALL

01:06:04 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE