Saturday Night Live — S01E09 — Elliott Gould with Anne Murray

00:00:01 Announcer: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE DEAD STRING QUARTET.

00:05:43 YOU. AND YOU SAID YOU LIKE ME, RIGHT? SURE DO.

00:08:13 KNOW, MAYBE YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN THE WRONG HOUSE. THE PEOPLE NEXT DOOR...

00:11:39 THINGS ARE NOT GOING SO WELL AT MY OLIVE OIL COMPANY. NO.

00:14:18 WE'RE REALLY ON YOUR SIDE. I MEAN, LIKE, WE KNOW WHERE YOU'RE COMING FROM.

00:17:43 IT'S DURABLE, AND IT'S SCUFF-RESISTANT. AND IT'S DELICIOUS!

00:21:43 SAID LAST NIGHT, TOO. WELL, I DON'T KNOW IF I SAID ANYTHING.

00:25:33 THE FBI HAVE DECIDED TO MERGE, FORMING A NEW GOVERNMENT AGENCY TO BE KNOWN, STRANGELY ENOUGH,

00:28:00 AND THIS IS THE FIRST SUCH SPACE SHOT TO TAKE PLACE. BEHIND ME, A SATURN ROCKET

00:30:32 ARE CALLING "KILLER DOPE," HAS BEEN SMUGGLED INTO NEW YORK CITY.

00:33:40 THE BORDER INTO CALIFORNIA. SIGHTINGS HAVE MOSTLY BEEN CONFINED TO RURAL AREAS.

00:36:29 LOOK, LOOK, FELLAS. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. WE... WE DON'T HAVE ANY POLLEN.

00:38:48 I'M SURE IT'S JUST A MINOR TECHNICAL PROBLEM. I'LL SEE TO IT RIGHT NOW.

00:41:20 MEET, OKAY? OH, HI, HONEY. UM, ELLIOT, THIS IS MY MOM.

00:43:44 MOST COMPREHENSIVE RESEARCH PROGRAM EVER ATTEMPTED FOR ONE INDIVIDUAL.

00:45:54 HOWEVER, ONCE THE INFORMATION WAS FED INTO A COMPUTER, THE RESULTS WERE ASTOUNDING.

00:48:08 THIS TEST WAS DESIGNED TO SHOW JUST HOW DEEP AUDIENCE FEELINGS RAN.

00:50:27 WOW. HEY, PEUTA, COULD WE START RIGHT HERE ON PAGE 92?

00:52:51 THROAT. AND THEN I'M GONNA TWIST HIS NECK.

00:55:52 CHILDBIRTH, WHICH HAS HAD AN ASTOUNDING EFFECT ON OBSTETRICS AND PEDIATRICS IN THE LAST FEW

00:58:23 IT'S AS SIMPLE AS THAT. PERHAPS YOU WOULD CARE TO DEMONSTRATE FOR US.

01:02:31 AND, YOU KNOW, BEING FROM MINNESOTA, AND SINCE THIS IS OUR BICENTENNIAL YEAR, TOM AND I

01:04:46 WHICH, UH, BRINGS US TO OUR FILM CLIP. AS WE ALL KNOW, W.H.A.P.T. HAS

01:07:27 GOOD NIGHT!