Sarah Millican: Chatterbox Live

00:00:04 - Five minutes, Sarah. - I'm just gonna go and have a quick snack.

00:04:46 Wonder if I should have been bearing that in mind when I was viewing properties.

00:08:51 "I can't wait till he starts fucking other women.

00:12:50 But I, er... In this job, I tend to travel, mostly around the UK.

00:16:59 Although it's in the spare room and whenever friends stay over

00:21:36 And when I get in from work, wherever I've been

00:25:29 - (Audience members) Yes. - Oh, they sound so sad.

00:29:42 I Can Make You Sleep.

00:33:59 Sometimes wouldn't even need the paint. Oh!

00:38:04 Yes. Is this... Oh.

00:42:20 somebody should rub one in your face before the end of the show.

00:46:32 But chances are you probably already knew where he was

00:51:21 Has anybody else... Give us a cheer if you've had a go on a bidet.

00:56:03 but I'm pretty sure my mam doesn't really know how it works.

01:00:20 or slogans, that sort of thing.

01:04:54 I say that so you don't think I've got a big jaggedy fanny.

01:09:47 I like that there's at least 60 per cent of the room going

01:13:47 I'm not gonna tell you, I'm not your mam.

01:18:05 But he is a lovely man. He's lovely.

01:22:35 I was gonna say that I've dressed up, but I haven't really. It's slightly different.

01:26:45 Now, I'm divorced. And when I got divorced, it came as quite a surprise to me. Erm...

01:31:14 He said, "That's so that you can get them on your wrists."

01:35:52 Don't mean for a glass of water.

01:40:05 (Audience whooping)