Punchline

00:01:15 You're Lilah?

00:06:35 Was this on the prep sheet?

00:10:55 - Who's got $100? - You need a tape, trust me.

00:14:50 Ladies and gentlemen, Ms. Lilah Krytsick.

00:18:27 You do many interesting things in medical school, play fascinating games.

00:22:30 I can gargle dishwater and fart O Canada at the same time.

00:25:50 These people I've invited want to meet my family.

00:29:53 - Three kids, great. - My feeling is that...

00:33:45 You just wrote a joke. Yes. Charlie Manson, the babysitter.

00:39:15 - What are you doing? What's the matter? - Where are you going?

00:45:02 - I don't have a talent scout coming, Albert. - Really? Who tried to call?

00:49:27 ...you blew up a sporting goods store and you want to dust?

00:54:12 ...that I couldn't stand to see things suffer...

00:59:11 Yes, you do. The subway.

01:04:49 You should have let me say it.

01:08:56 - What's wrong with the phone? - I don't know.

01:14:17 Steven.

01:19:07 Don't be scared, because I'm funny Steve with a lampshade on his head...

01:26:34 I mean, do it.

01:31:09 An Iranian guy'll say:

01:35:13 I have to tell this right off, folks. I have a drinking problem.

01:40:15 He had no clue what he was doing.

01:44:26 Or these geniuses who broke up the phone company.

01:49:39 I really did win?