National Lampoon's The Legend of Awesomest Maximus

00:04:23 (Narrator) The world's fate is decided by legends

00:07:27 Good point.

00:10:19 kind of way, if you know what I'm talking about.

00:13:42 Yeah, well the only reason you'll be remembered

00:18:13 I have the best idea. I have the best idea.

00:21:11 No, not any more. Ellen of Troy.

00:24:25 Mom, two wrongs don't make a right.

00:27:55 Let us consult the Oracle.

00:31:06 (narrator) Minoritees. His mom actually called him that.

00:33:54 There might be thousands of them, with bows and arrows

00:36:16 It's gonna be that good.

00:39:37 Come on, Testiclees' Cousin.

00:42:52 What are you trying to do? Suck his cock?

00:46:24 You're pushing me off the cliff. Whoa...

00:49:46 Anyway, Awesomest was still alive.

00:52:24 Awesomest Maximus.

00:55:26 It's time to prove yourself, change your life

00:59:33 Tickets.

01:03:36 And anything else if it makes you more comfortable.

01:07:19 Sit on his face! Sit on his face!

01:12:06 (wheels creaking)

01:15:31 I saw this going differently in my mind.

01:19:54 and all the time you were spending with her.

01:23:26 Today, sir, you have come a long way--