My Name Is Earl — S01E14 — Monkeys in Space

00:00:03 YOU KNOW THE KIND OF GUY WHO DOES NOTHING BUT BAD THINGS...

00:00:38 CAN I HAVE MORE MONEY FOR THE CLAW MACHINE?

00:01:22 AS BAD AS I FELT FOR HANK, I HAD MY OWN PROBLEM.

00:02:03 ABOUT 10 MINUTES LATER WITH HIS TONGUE DOWN THIS STRIPPER'S THROAT,

00:02:59 YOU'RE DAMN NEAR 30 YEARS OLD. YOU NEED TO START ACTING LIKE AN ADULT LIKE THE REST OF US.

00:03:43 I DON'T MIND SUPPORTIN' YOU, BUT I DON'T WANNA RUN OUT OF MONEY...

00:04:23 GOOD FOR YOU. SO, WHAT'S UP? YOU HERE JUST FOR A VISIT?

00:05:15 AND BRING SOME DOUGHNUTS. FROM YUMMY'S. FRESH ONES.

00:06:13 SINCE VISITING HOURS AT THE JAIL WERE OVER AT NOON,

00:07:01 UM, "NOT ONLY MAKIN' MONEY, BUT MAKIN' THE WORLD A BRIGHTER PLACE."

00:08:00 I DON'T TRUST ELEVATORS. THEY BREAK, FALL AND PARALYZE PEOPLE.

00:08:42 "HALF CIRCLE. REMEMBER TO MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT.

00:09:38 TELL HANK I SAID HELLO.

00:10:26 I FELT BAD THAT RANDY WAS HAVIN' TROUBLE FINDING HIS PURPOSE IN LIFE,

00:11:18 I SAW FOOTLOOSE'S WIFE DO IT IN THAT MOVIE...

00:12:51 DAMN IT.

00:13:38 THERE AIN'T ENOUGH COSMETICS IN THE WORLD TO COVER YOUR DUMB-LOOKIN' FACE.

00:14:59 OH!

00:15:47 YOU DON'T HAVE TO HOLD ANYTHING. JUST GET ME ON THE SEAT. I'LL GO LIKE A GIRL.

00:17:16 - OKEYDOKEY. - OH, HEY, YOU HAVE TO TAKE HER DROPS.

00:18:00 ALL RIGHT. LET'S DO THIS.

00:18:46 HMM. HOW WAS PRISON?

00:20:15 IF I'M GONNA CROSS OFF ALL THE STUFF ON MY LIST,

00:21:05 JUST PUT YOUR HEAD BACK. I DON'T WANT THEM!