My Name Is Earl — S01E03 — Randy's Touchdown

00:00:03 YOU KNOW THE KIND OF GUY WHO DOES NOTHING BUT BAD THINGS...

00:00:48 AND THE MORE BAD THINGS I CROSS OFF MY LIST,

00:01:36 HOLD IT. DON'T CALL THE POLICE. THEY STILL GOT MY PICTURE UP OVER AT THE CIRCUIT CITY.

00:02:31 WHERE'S MY GRANDFATHER'S CUCKOO CLOCK?

00:03:11 FIXED A HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL GAME.

00:04:01 I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE ROSIE'S FACE WHEN I PAY HER BACK.

00:05:18 WHAT IT'S LIKE TO SCORE A TOUCHDOWN?

00:06:00 I DIDN'T REALIZE THERE WERE OTHER PEOPLE LIKE ME.

00:07:01 I DON'T KNOW. I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER BEING A MONKEY.

00:07:53 HEY, EARL. JOY HAD NO IDEA THAT YOUR LOTTO MONEY WAS IN YOUR CAR.

00:08:48 EXCUSE ME, SIR. I'M HERE TO PICK UP MY CAR.

00:09:32 SEE?

00:10:29 SO, THEY TELL ME YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A LOAN.

00:11:20 COME ON. IT'S ONLY $20.

00:12:01 ONCE I'M TOWED INTO THE IMPOUND, I'LL HOP OUT, GET MY MONEY,

00:12:48 YOU STOP IT. YOU STOP IT!

00:13:41 WATCH MY BACK.

00:14:44 THEY PAY BY THE POUND. WE NEED HEAVIER CANS.

00:15:50 THIS IS HIS LAST CHANCE TO SCORE.

00:17:31 WITHOUT MY HUNDRED GRAND, I'D HAVE TO GET A JOB,

00:18:29 YOU TWO NEED A RIDE?

00:19:08 I DID IT BECAUSE YOU'RE MY BROTHER AND I WANTED TO.

00:19:45 AS FOR KENNY,

00:20:57 KARMA. YOU GOTTA LOVE IT.