Johnny Vegas: Live At The Benidorm Palace

00:00:28 (Chatter)

00:03:23 - ..the lights? - (Man shouts)

00:05:45 And l got the teacher to write in ''one million pounds''.

00:08:20 And then l won a talent contest.

00:10:49 l borrow the neighbours'.

00:14:03 ''and therefore you will not be taking part in the lesson.''

00:17:12 where, apparently, she was considered quite the intellectual.

00:19:27 And you sell 'em a Spanish one so she can get her hair done.

00:21:45 lt's not the show l was fucking planning.

00:24:38 ''l...l'm obviously desperately in love with the woman l'm with.''

00:26:57 but it actually appears that, erm... he's knobbing his secretary.

00:29:40 lt's like care in the community, isn't it?

00:32:15 Cos kids are very honest.

00:35:05 with a playing card...

00:37:50 l implore you, this is no Sticky Vicky.

00:40:03 another so-called Sticky Vicky, came out.

00:42:46 And they like to fold everything.

00:45:47 Cosmic fucking ordering.

00:48:13 Don't raise him to respect women

00:50:28 Look at me. Have l ever, ever, ever lied to you?

00:53:21 (# Righteous Brothers.: Unchained Melody)

00:56:17 - (Laughing) - Argos bling is fine.

00:58:54 # Make a brand-new start of it

01:01:32 Thank you! Good night, God bless! Good night!