Jim Jefferies: Alcoholocaust
2010 · 75 MIN · IMDB 8.3 · 2,850 VOTES · DIR. Tim Kirkby
Overview
Share this *Alcoholocaust: (Meaning: The aftermath of a drinking party, usually resulting in every available horizontal surface being covered in empty booze containers, spilled beverages and a general sticky alcoholic residue.) Jim Jefferies, the globally renowned Australian stand-up, returns to Just For Laughs with his brand new solo show. Alcoholocaust includes some of Jim’s favourite wild antics over the past year. As always, his material is set in reality, which is what provides him with his trademark brutally frank style. Among other things, you will hear about a hilarious yet touching true story involving his friend’s severely disabled brother, plus Jim’s traditional pet peeves – religion & idiots.
Dialogue Timeline - 1,613 lines
A SAMPLE ACROSS THE RUNTIME - EVERY LINE IS SEARCHABLE
00:00:00 [ Horn honks ]
00:02:53 For me. I wouldn't enjoy the sex. I'd have to get through the sex.
00:05:15 Are you lesbians?" They'll be like, "what? What the fuck? What?
00:07:34 Over there it's like i'm king. The first time i go do a gig in iraq, they fly me and my manager
00:09:28 Bullets coming out of it like that thing that chewbacca wears. And we take off, and off we go
00:11:29 The hinge. And i'm like, "what's your fucking problem, man?"
00:14:14 So, while the americans were nuking the arabs, the chinese nuked the americans, and that's
00:17:14 22 and you get one, your brain goes to ass cancer. You're like, "oh, i got ass
00:19:29 She could tell i was nervous. And she sort of calmed me down and we had a little bit of a
00:21:14 Go, "you've just made this rape really awkward." She fucking freaks out!
00:23:58 Chick for a while. I start fucking her, and she sent me a text -- Well, you
00:26:17 To the cunt. But for some unbeknown reason, you have to act like you're not
00:28:48 "Oh, hello! I was visiting dimple-Y thigh. I forgot you lived down here.
00:31:47 In his life and been resuscitated -- Seven. And i once asked him -- I said
00:33:37 Andrew came home from work, i pulled andrew aside and said, "andrew, look, here's the deal.
00:35:42 We wanted to go in when the place was quiet and we weren't gonna cause a scene.
00:37:59 Now or forever hold your peace." And one of them went, "how bad is he?"
00:40:26 But i look at this way -- Even if i changed their names and their parents started watching
00:43:04 Andrew looks him up and down, and he turns to me and goes, "look -- He's very fragile.
00:45:30 It's very simple. It sounds like what it is. You put your cock under a very
00:48:34 Walk into the bar, who are obviously out of their fucking skulls on coke.
00:50:18 And he said, "do you know how to do that?" And i said, "no, i don't, but
00:52:49 Ejaculated through the power of yourself, you've never had another person do it, you're
02:00:02 president macaulay culkin got really upset with the arabs, and