It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia — S02E09 — Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass

00:00:02 WELL, THEN WHAT WOULD YOU SAY? SHE'S A QUITTER.

00:00:46 - THAT'S IT. I'M DONE WITH THIS. - IT'S A BAR.

00:01:27 HE WOULD RECOGNIZE THAT THE CONSTITUTION PROTECTS MY FREEDOM TO BLOW SMOKE ALL OVER HIS FACE.

00:02:56 THAT'S WHAT AMERICA'S ALL ABOUT, DEE! YEAH.

00:03:43 NO, JUST... I MEAN, YOU'RE ON THE SIDEWALK.

00:04:35 THESE ARE THE KIND OF PURITANICAL RESTRICTIONS THAT ARE KILLING THIS COUNTRY.

00:05:22 THOSE GIRLS ARE ALREADY WILD. PERFECT!

00:06:12 I CAN FEED YOU LINES. AND THEN I'LL GO FROM THERE.

00:06:59 IN ANY NUMBER OF WAYS... LIKE HOW?

00:07:40 THIS IS WHAT AMERICA'S ALL ABOUT! THIS IS AMERICA!

00:08:33 YOU BETCHA. OH, HERE.

00:09:36 ISN'T THAT AMAZING? YOU ASK TO SEE A WOMAN'S BREASTS ON THE STREET, YOU GET SLAPPED.

00:10:22 I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE IN JAIL. PAROLE.

00:11:16 IT'S A FREE COUNTRY, BITCH.

00:12:12 - GREAT. - AND NOW, IF YOU DON'T MIND, I'LL TAKE THOSE KNIVES.

00:13:02 - HOLY SHIT! - HOW'S IT HANGING?

00:13:47 YOU'RE MY ACTOR. I NEED YOU. BUT YOU'RE SO BAD AT PROTESTING.

00:14:55 OH. NOT EVERYONE HAS THE GIFT. HMM.

00:15:51 I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS.

00:16:39 I CAN TELL IT IS GOING TO BE A GLORIOUS PERFORMANCE.

00:17:29 WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! HEY, MAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? TYING OFF.

00:18:21 THAT'S WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO DO FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. DON'T GIVE UP.

00:19:05 - YOU GET FORK STABBED! - GET OUT!

00:20:18 FRANK!