George Carlin: On Campus

00:00:00 [School bell]

00:02:39 Nice to see you all.

00:05:12 but we do still have time for a quick Hail Mary.

00:07:52 that vuja de?

00:10:11 it's a pile of stuff with a cover on it.

00:12:13 and they give you a little place to sleep, you know

00:14:30 Sometimes I go like this.

00:17:14 Whoa, goddamn, that was cyanide they were putting in there.

00:19:19 Tell him you don't need a two-martini lunch

00:21:58 And of course, the Army heard about it and they came around

00:23:59 I like that.

00:25:47 But I'm in the car and I'm right up front.

00:28:08 And you're used to your car

00:30:25 Didn't it seem that way to you

00:32:23 or even somebody mildly weird.

00:35:21 instead of having those cute little lights

00:38:07 a couple of things that go without saying

00:40:25 where he plunged eight stories to his death.

00:42:59 And if it doesn't how do you know if you have it right?

00:45:18 No smell, just the cushion, see?

00:48:13 People would say hey, come on over to the house

00:50:46 That's one of them phrases that doesn't really mean

00:53:22 In football in the stands, you can be sure

00:55:34 Australian dick wrestling.