Family Guy — S05E16 — No Chris Left Behind

00:00:03 ♪ It seems today that all you see

00:01:00 Lois, don't freaking put me through this again.

00:01:33 If you want to teach us a lesson... Yeah, that's even better.

00:02:28 So am I! What?

00:03:27 Let me see that.

00:04:23 We gonna have a puppet show, we gonna have some jazz.

00:05:01 This is not what the founding fathers had in mind.

00:05:41 Cool, I don't have to go to school.

00:06:21 ALL: Kill them!

00:06:56 I don't know. Is there some kind of pre-school program?

00:10:24 Oh, my God, that's ridiculous.

00:10:57 That may have been the best halibut I've ever had.

00:11:25 Don't you talk to my wife like that!

00:13:03 He has to shoot and star in a shot-for-shot remake of Liar Liar

00:13:55 Hi, is this Room 214?

00:14:52 This school is not for your kind!

00:15:47 All right, look, I'll tell you what.

00:16:50 Chris, welcome to the Skull and Bones Society.

00:17:31 Sorry, Thunder, I got to put you down.

00:18:18 MAN: Buttscratcher! Buttscratcher!

00:19:09 Well, tell us everything, sweetie. How's school going so far?

00:19:42 And I got a job following fat people around with a tuba.

00:20:37 Is there any way you can get me back into James Woods High?

00:21:27 No one taught me about carbs!