Dylan Moran: Like, Totally

00:00:21 Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage

00:03:01 When is the last time you spoke to somebody from the country?

00:05:23 You know? They're not sophisticated. They sit there. You're there…one o`clock in the morning...

00:08:10 (accent) "Oh, sorry. Did I break all your #%@@? I didn't know it was yours."

00:11:06 I think the Americans you see in Europe are all the ones...

00:13:59 You know? It's like a big four-wheel-drive thing.

00:16:37 twilight would be dwindling and you could hear...

00:19:31 Even Hitler was vegetarian. That's how bad the food is.

00:22:03 "What time is it?" "It's six minutes to nine." "Is it?"

00:24:34 You will notice though that the kind of people...

00:27:01 In all the catholic iconography, pointing:

00:29:28 You probably sent the child to bed because you were just tired talking to the child.

00:32:15 "I really do. Everyday is the same !+$%$!# #%@@. I don't know why I keep coming back."

00:35:08 We lie awake at night tossing and turning, masturbating with both hands...

00:38:39 You record something to look back on it.

00:41:06 "I can't carry on, I don't understand my life anymore,..."

00:43:56 "It's fantastic what you're doing. I love the way you're handling this."

00:46:50 They turned heads.

00:49:41 Really what they're saying to one another is:

00:52:22 It's just God showing off:

00:55:13 "But do you think it's possible you may feel this way...

00:57:47 "Why do you breathe like that? It sounds like it's coming through your !+$%$!# forehead!"

01:01:28 Ok…you know..quickly 'cause...

01:03:52 And you know when that happens I think. People know when that happens to them...