Demetri Martin. Person.

00:00:17 A lot of things happened

00:01:41 Oh, ok. They're saying I should do more. Alright.

00:03:10 No structural damage to rock.

00:04:38 Then I got to pull the straw aside.

00:06:07 'These freakin' tiny- Four?! Really, four tiny garbage cans, are you kidding me?!'

00:07:30 'I have some good news.'

00:08:48 'Sorry, just coming through here.'

00:10:31 And I hope I never have to again.

00:11:57 Ok. How about;

00:13:19 'Oh really?' 'Yeah, he's very intuitive.'

00:15:01 Finally pillow fights:

00:16:31 Could be good.

00:18:17 How fast does a zebra have to run before he looks gray?

00:19:58 Location! Location! Location!

00:21:44 He's dead, but

00:23:09 Some of them are liars.

00:27:03 Specifically with respect to animals.

00:28:34 This creature only exists if you don't believe it exists.

00:31:56 Laugh Quietly To Myself

00:33:11 'If you don't need anything I'm Mike.'

00:35:06 Right up until I tell them.

00:36:30 Looks like you're writing a ransom note.

00:38:16 Because glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.

00:40:07 Looks like