00:02:56 Ladies and gentlemen !
00:03:00 Eddie Murphy!
00:03:44 Thank you. Thank you so much. Two times, far two times.
00:03:51 Before I even get started how about a big round of applause for the Bus Boys.
00:04:10 There's some rules, I got some rules when I show down and I do my standup, I got rules and shit.
00:04:16 Faggots aren't allowed to look at my ass while I'm on stage !
00:04:25 That's why I keep moving while I'm up here.
00:04:28 You don't know where the faggot section is, you gotta keep movin'.
00:04:32 So if they do see it, quick, you switch, they don't get no long stares at your shit...
00:04:38 ...so that their imagination is flowing about my...
00:04:42 I know when you're looking, 'cos my ass starts to get hot.
00:04:46 I'm afraid of gay people. Petrified. I have nightmares about gay people.
00:04:50 I have this nightmare that I go to Hollywood and find out that Mr. T is a faggot.
00:04:57 Really, and he'd be walking up to people going: "Hey, boy ! Hey, boy !"
00:05:03 "You look mighty cute in them jeans !"
00:05:12 "Now come on over here, and fuck me up the ass !"
00:05:20 "I'm gonna bend over now !"
00:05:30 "Hey, boy, slow down ! You're gonna miss the round, and come too fast !"
00:05:35 "You make me get get mad I clench up my buttcheeks and rip your dick of !"
00:05:45 You know who would be a funny faggot? Ralph Kramden and Ed Norton!
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